All posts by Jellybean Jade

omg i havent read your fanfic in foreverrrrr

ill try to catch up over the weekend!

ik i havent been online in a long time but uh,

okay so ill skip the boring school updates and talk abt whats been at the front of my mind lately

tw: qu**rmisia, anxiety, family/religion issues

my church and my mom have been talking abt "homosexuality" a lot (maybe that needs to be censored sorry idk) and its rly giving me anxiety for the future

ive always had a vague plan for what ill do after college but now i just dont know what to do

i want to be in qprs with girls but be able to talk to my family

i want to move to canada but stay in my church with my friends

i want to be a screenwriter but the sag aftra strikes arent looking so hot

i want to be me but project 2025 exists

i want to be a christian but be lgbtq+

its just making me freak out atp and i know i shouldnt be bc im only a freshman and it is what it is and blah blah blah

but i legit cant sleep for hours on end bc im thinking too much and my sleep schedule has crumbled

i also feel sick to the stomach every sunday morning when the pastor (who i really look up to and admire) talks about how "there are lgbtq+ people everywhere around us, even in our own families" and "we will talk about sexuality more in the future"

one of my church friends is bi and the two of us are just really uncomfortable all the time

tldr being lgbtq+ is ruining my life haha

tw: b*p*lar d*s*rder

i havent talked to bipolar friend all summer and i have this whole a** essay to send to them but i know theyll freak out

so i just keep rereading and editing that essay knowing ill never send it

its okay tho i have a good playlist ill survive

no tws from here on

at least i have therapy in the form of my amazing friends and makeup and swim is actually helping me air out my frustrations so yay

finallyyyyy the new olivia rodrigo album

teenage dream>

the grudge>>

logical>>>

making the bed>>>

pretty isnt pretty>>>>>>

edit: forgot to mention but lacy basically means olivia came out right?? like no straight women writes lines abt other women like "i despise my jealous eyes and how they fell for you"

omg i have not been on here in forever so heres a massive dump-

swim is actual f🏊‍♀️cking torture. we jump into a freezing pool at 8:00 am and swim for two hours straight

heres yesterday's practice

its sideways but whatever

THAT WAS THE WARMUP. THE F🏊‍♀️CKING WARMUP.

if warmups were hell then the main set is whatever the f🏊‍♀️ck is below that

i mean at least ive made a dozen or so friends who are upperclassmen so thats nice

anywayyy the final few weeks summer has been fun. lots of going out w friends, lots of makeup, lots of good food

taylor swift updates!! me and my friend who introduced me to taylor are going to watch the eras tour movie, also 1989 tv (which means clean tv which means MY FAVORITE SONG WITH TAYLORS NEW VOCALS AAAAH), annnd snippets of rep tv in the summer i turned pretty and some other tv show idk

SPEAKING OF TSITP I LIVE FOR STEVEN AND TAYLOR AND ALSO CAM CAMERON

i hope both sides of bellys pillow are warm >:(

starting school on the fifth>>> any other time

omg dia, praying for you

thats great, sillybranch!

duck, no i havent, so its very new to me

THE BIRDS ARE SO SMOL

also spam musubi and bananas in hawaii are sooo buss

duck, im in *oahu, turns out honolulu is the city not the island lmao

im in hawaii!!!

ten hour flight was a lot of fun lmao

so yesterday me and my friends went to do our summer reading at the library and we wanted to use the vending machine. it worked fine for them but it got stuck for me so i put in another dollar and BOOM the entire row of sour patch fell out and i had like ten sour patch when i paid for two

fun times

also the library has a coffee machine and i really milked that

$50 on makeup whaaaat

i mean at least i look and feel like i could dominate the world so like its worth it totally absolutely completycgakxkqjebrjxlqfhisjw

WHY IS MAKEUP SO EXPENSIVE

also this place in town sells mochinuts and theyre really freaking good

the matcha one is actually so buss

also they have those amazing aloe drinks i love those sm

barbie is freaking good what the freak

i am kenoughhhh

also today was so much fun omg

my friends and i were HOT A** B**CHES OKAY

oh no im really sorry quinn, healing isnt always linear but the relapses always hurt the most

sillybranch, i know it sucks right now but your life is just starting and youll make new friends down the line

made a snapchat acc!!

you mean X? /j

omg im watching barbie in a few days and im so excited-

great drawing, kit!

got last at the championships :((

oh well at least i got in

chili oil ramen>>>>

this is the sh*t

edit: photos are so annoying istg

STOP SAYING SWIMMING 😭😭

dont say the word swim its traumatizing /hj

19 shows done

august ninth = 8/9

1989 TAYLORS VERSION ANNOUNCEMENT WOOOOO

remember when i pulled up and said get in the clown car 🤡🤡